Monday, January 17, 2011

Punta Cana: Meeting the KGB

So here we are at the beach.  Our first full day in this glorious sunshine with happiness all around us.  We had settled into to beach lounge chairs after getting our towels from the Towel Shack.  As we're basking in the sun...well, I should say as I was basking in the sun...because apparently my daughter doesn't close her eyes under her sunglasses.  Suddenly, she whispered, "Mommy, don't look now, but there's a woman walking topless on the beach."  I asked her where...which direction.  Slowly I sat up and turned.  Holy hooters!!!  I had NEVER been anywhere where women went topless!  Then as we gazed around the beach, there was another one or should I say two?  Then one came jogging down the beach!  Then a man walking with his whatever and she was topless too!  Okay, so I was a little taken off guard by this custom, but I adjusted.  It just took me a little while.  Anyway after a few Ocean Blues, they all looked the same to me anyway!  Just an aside here...I'm not a big drinker.  For instance, you know those Smirnoff Lemonade thingys...lets just say that two of those, makes me buzzy.  Got the picture?

Jennifer and I had eaten a big breakfast so we were planning on doing a light lunch and a big dinner.  We headed over to the restaurant to get some lunch.  Now mind you, when we were at the beach two men kept walking by us at the water's edge.  One was heavy set and the other was thinner.  Both had receding hairlines.  They were wearing Speedos.  Do you know what a Speedo is?  A bit of advice...don't wear a Speedo if you're a man...not if you want to impress me anyway!  They were definitely not Dominican.  They were not Oriental.  They were not South American.  They were not American.  They were speaking a language that was totally unrecognizable to us.  We knew it wasn't Dutch.  Nor was it French.  We decided between us and after several Ocean Blues, that they were of  Slavic origin.....with those high foreheads.  Yep, we decided, after more Ocean Blues that they were the KGB...we laughed.  We laughed a lot!!

We ordered lunch and while we were sitting there on the shaded porch not far from the water's edge, there they went.  The KGB had followed us...we laughed!  Our lunch arrived and as we ate, suddenly two men appeared over my right shoulder as I continued to face Jennifer.  I really did NOT want to look at these men in Speedos standing so close to me.  It was the KGB!  It was their Speedos...asking us to have a drink with them at 5:00pm.  I kept my back to them but facing my daughter, I watched her politely smile and say, "no thank you."  They walked away and headed down the beach.

We were right.  They spoke with a broken accent.  They were KGB!!!  But it wasn't the last time we would see them.  You know the KGB...they never give up!!

to be continued...


  1. Pretty picture. I wish I was at the ocean right now. But not topless. ;-)

  2. Ahhhh, to be hit on by two older KGB men and in Speedos!
    Now that is a vacation.....

  3. UGH! Don't you just love being hit on my guys - in speedos - as you eat lunch!!! :)

    Were they all hairy to boot?

  4. Yes > in other countries nudity is just normal.. When Dick our friend went to Sovania to the World's ploughing matches he said one day they all went to the beach.. They were surprised to see EVERYONE nude.. they thought they had come to a nudist beach but NO that is how they are there..
    I can't imagine seeing a man in a Speedo standing next to me while I'm sitting down. That would be just too funny. Glad you had your daughter with you. Have to watch the KGB..they are very persistant..~! have a tiggeriffic day~! ta ta for now from Iowa

  5. Glad you guys are having so much fun. But, come on, you can do better than guys in speedos!

  6. It was an eye opener for us too in Mexico! KGB, that's funny!

  7. I can't wait to hear what happens next with the KGB *giggles*


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